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The Bearded Fool


A man believes his beard makes him look wise and sophisticated. He is shocked to discover that he has been embarrassingly and tragically mistaken! 

Once upon a time, there was a man with an extraordinarily long beard. It was so long that it reached down past his waist. He was very proud of his beard. Every day he washed it, dried it, and carefully combed it, making sure that it was always in perfect condition.

“My long beard makes me look so intelligent and dignified…., like a professor……or a wise sage,” he would think to himself, admiring his magnificent whiskers in the mirror.

One night, the man was in his house, sitting in his study reading a book by candlelight. He was sitting in a comfy leather armchair with a cat sleeping by the fire at his feet. The room was covered from floor to ceiling with shelves, all of which contained the cleverest and most important books the world had ever known.

He was particularly enjoying a book of wise sayings throughout history - until he came across a sentence that read, "Any man with a

long beard is a fool."

“What?” he thought. “This cannot be true! I must have read something wrong!”

So he placed his reading spectacles on the end of his nose. ncidentally, he thought this made him look even more intelligent. Then he read the sentence again, very carefully.

"Any man with a long beard is a fool.”

The man was utterly horrified. " I always thought a long beard was a sign of intelligence, I thought my long beard made me look so scholarly and wise!" he cried. "I have been tragically mistaken. All this time, I” ve thought that everyone has been admiring me, but instead, everyone has been thinking I am a fool!"

The deeper the man pondered, the more depressed he became. "No, no! I can”t take any chances. Maybe what is written in the book is true."

He was so dreadfully disappointed and deeply embarrassed that he decided to get rid of his long beard at once. I will recover my dignity!” he cried, and hunted high and low for a pair of scissors.

He searched the kitchen – “I know I left them here somewhere!”

Ransacked the bathroom – “Scissors! Scissors! For pity”s sake, where are you?”

And turned his study upside down – “AAAAAHHH!”

But could he find them?

No!

But he had another idea!

“There must be a razor here somewhere!” he cried, charging back into the chaos of the bathroom. Again he rummaged around, and again he found…

Nothing!

He scratched his head. “Bah! Of course I have no razor. I haven”t shaved in decades.”

He tried to pull his beard out with his hands but that was never going to work!

Then he saw the cat still sleeping by the fire. He found some string and tied one end to his beard, and the other to the tail of that cat. Then, he howled loudly like a wolf, which sent the cat running away in panic! The string lengthened and tightened, but it did not break. Instead, the poor man was dragged around and around the house by his beard, until mercifully, his knot loosened from the cat”s tail. The cat departed with an indignant hiss, leaving the man alone in his desperation. With despair he caught his breath, staring vacantly into the flame of a flickering candle.

“I’ve got it!” he said. “Yes!” he roared, “Of course, why didn’t I think of it before!” he cried, grabbing the offending hair in his hands and without thinking, held the tip over the flame of the candle. It caught fire instantly! But, the flames licked up the length of his beard

much faster than he had expected. In mere moments, the hair was all gone and the fire was singeing his face. Then, his curly moustache

caught fire. Then a spark leapt up into the hair on his eyebrows, and then his head until all his hair was on fire!

"Aaaaiiiieeeee!" the man screeched. “My head! My Hair. HEEEELP!”

Within moments the fire was out! The was nothing left to burn! The hair on his head had all burnt to ash.

Hearing his cries, the neighbours came running with buckets of water at the ready. They were shocked to see his scorched face and

head, surrounded by a little cloud of smoke.

"How did this happen?" they cried, drenching him with water.

“I read in my book that men with long beards are fools,” said the man, sadly, "and indeed, I have proved it to be right!"


QUIZ TIME!

  1. Why was the man proud of his beard? Answer: B. Because it reached down past his waist.

  • A. Because it was short and neat.

  • B. Because it reached down past his waist.

  • C. Because it was red in color.

  • D. Because it was messy and tangled.

  1. What did the man read in the book that made him horrified? Answer: B. "Any man with a long beard is a fool."

  • A. "Any man with a short beard is wise."

  • B. "Any man with a long beard is a fool."

  • C. "Any man with a beard is handsome."

  • D. "Any man with a beard is smart."

  1. How did the man try to remove his beard? Answer: D. He tied it to his cat and scared the cat away.

  • A. He tried to pull it out with his hands.

  • B. He used a pair of scissors.

  • C. He found a razor and shaved it off.

  • D. He tied it to his cat and scared the cat away.

  1. What happened when the man tried to burn off his beard? Answer: C. His hair caught fire and burned quickly.

  • A. The flame spread to his cat.

  • B. The fire went out immediately.

  • C. His hair caught fire and burned quickly.

  • D. He successfully removed his beard.

  1. Why did the neighbors come running with buckets of water? Answer: C. To put out the fire on his head.

  • A. To help the man find his cat.

  • B. To see his new haircut.

  • C. To put out the fire on his head.

  • D. To ask him about the book he read.

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